Stuff Hipsters Like: The Holiday Gift List Edition

18 12 2008

Let us begin by stating that hipsters celebrate all holidays. The true hipster, out of work and slightly maladjusted, enjoys the holiday season and all that it has to offer. A combination of cleverer than usual gift giving and theme-based parties/drinks keep them coming back every year. As the last major weekend of holiday shopping begins, let us remember that hipster runoff began contemplating what to get on October 12th. Don’t you just hate people who get their gifts early, like in April.


Here are some gift ideas for the hipster in your life:


The Christmas Cactus

tf102-3This classic, and we’re not sure why it’s a classic, is both low-maintenance and prickly, similar to a hipster and his or her hair style on rave nights. Whether you water this excuse for a plant with actual water or PBR, it doesn’t matter… This plant will live, grow and bloom just like you!



A USB Missile Launcher

30531-99This is a PC only device. The last PC only device… Sigh… 

If you have a PC, you now have something to hang over everyone’s head. This is pretty self explanatory. Missile Launcher>Computer>Press of a button>Warfare.

The $40 launcher shoots missiles up to 15 feet so plan accordingly. Defend your area Space Marine! Get it Here


Coffee Table Books:


28170138Coffee table books are very important. Here we have a huge Ansel Adams book, the Pitchfork 500,

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 a baby photo album and pens. Maybe you can get away without this one, but if you feel it necessary to impress check this out. 

Art and Sole is a book by Nathan Gale about contemporary sneaker art and design.  The next one is titled, Vinyl Junkies and is written by Brett Milano. Both books will atleast begin a conversation. “Oh, what is that red book doing here?”

These books are designed for show. Do not look for substance and or entertainment.


Christmas Drinking Glove

christmasdrinkingglove2This gift is sure to warm the heart and hands of any hipster who receives it. A glove designed to keep your hand warm on your bronson and instantly turn you into the center of the party. Red, White and able to block the light.

 

 


Impeach-Mints

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From the Unemployed Philosophers Guild, these are the perfect three dollar stocking stuffer for your hipster. Peach Mints will play well in the south too.

Peach flavored ImpeachMints ™ Oh, the sweetness of a Bush impeachment can be savored if only for a moment with these ImpeachMints. Fantasize about sending Bush back to Crawford. Get them Here 


Morrissey Tickets

morrisseyongrassUnless you’ve “Never Had No One Ever”, you should be able to find it in your heart to give the gift of Morrissey. The 49 year old crooner will be releasing a new album entitled Years of Refusal, and will be embarking on a world-wide doom and gloom tour starting in Boca Raton. Morrissey… you’re so Alt. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc.In the midst of life we are in debt etc! Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc.Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc.Etc. You Sweet Tender Hooligan you.


Tour Dates:

02/28 – Boca Raton, FL @ Mizner Park

03/01 – Orlando, FL @ Hard Rock live

03/03 – Jacksonville, FL @ Florida Theater
03/04 – St. Petersburg, FL @ Jannus Landing
03/06 – Myrtle Beach, SC @ House of Blues
03/07 – Atlanta, GA @ Variety Playhouse
03/09 – Asheville, NC @ Orange Peel
03/11 – Durham, NC @ Durham Performing Arts Center
03/13 – Richmond, VA @ The National
03/14 – Washington, DC @ Warner Theater
03/16 – Montclair, NJ @ Wellmont Theater
03/17 – Pittsburgh, PA @ Carnegie Music Hall
03/19 – Buffalo, NY @ University of Buffalo Center for the Arts
03/21 – New York, NY @ Bowery Ballroom
03/22 – Philadelphia, PA @ Acadmy of Music
03/25 – New York, NY @ Webster Hall
03/26 – New York, NY @ Carnegie Hall
03/28 – Mashantucket, CT @ Foxwoods
03/29 – Boston, MA @ House of Blues
03/31 – Ann Arbor, MI @ Michigan Theater
04/01 – Columbus, OH @ Palace Theater
04/03 – Milwaukee, WI @ Eagles Ballroom
04/04 – Chicago, IL @ Aragon Ballroom
04/06 – Minneapolis, MN @ State Theater
04/07 – Kansas City, MO @ Midland Theater
04/08 – St. Louis, MO @ Pageant Theater
04/10 – Dallas, TX @ Palladium Ballroom
04/11 – Houston, TX @ Jesse H. Jones Hall
04/12 – Austin, TX @ Bass Concert Hall
04/14 – El Paso, TX @ Chavez Theater
04/15 – Albuquerque, NM @ Sunshine Theater

William, It was Really Nothing. 

 

Look for a best of 2008 list in the next few weeks. 

 

 

 


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